By Hal McCoy
UNSOLICITED OBSERVATIONS from The Man Cave, ignoring Nadine’s suggestion that I vacate the 100° Man Cave for the air-conditioned comfort of The Sun Room. Why? When I ask if I can smoke my cigars she says, “Enjoy heat and the smoke in the garage.” It’s not a Man Cave to her, it’s the garage.
—OUR PAL SAL: Unless you are a dyed-in-the-red Cicinnati Reds fan, there isn’t much reason to watch a last place team stumble around.
There is, though, one huge reason and everybody knows the reason: Sal Stewart.
As the season progresses, his feats and his legend grows and here is the latest:
Only three players in MLB history have in one month produced 12 or more homers, six or more stolen bases and six or more walks.
Those players are Babe Ruth (June 1920, May 1930), Willie Mays (July 1955) and. . .Sal Stewart (August, 2026).
And neither Ruth nor Mays did it in their rookie seasons.
With runners on base, Stewart turns into an RBI demon. If the Reds have runners on third and first with first base open pitching to Stewart is like asking Dean Martin to guard your drink.
Stewart is the ultimate team guy, always leaves the ‘m’ and ‘e’ in team. But the rest of the Reds are to Stewart what Robin is to Batman, what Avis is to Hertz, what Garfunkel is to Simon and what Alydar was to Affirmed.
Former infielder Mark DeRosa, now host of MLB Central, said it perfectly: “On a team that has spent the season toiling in mediocrity, Sal Stewart is the constant. He will be a star for a long, long time.”
Stewart clearly is the best Reds rookie since B.C.1.
—GO PAL JOEY, GO: On a recent MLB Network show, Joey Votto said, perhaps whimsically, perhaps truthfuly, that if asked, he would accept the role of Cincinnati Reds general manager.
Then on Sunday night, Votto, Jeff Brantley and Anthony Rizzo served as analysts on NBC’s telecast of the Reds and Cubs game.
They talked incessantly, non-stop, about anything and everything. But Votto offered this incisive comment:
“Cincinnati is among the smallest cities in MLB, but we were the first Major League team. The city has charm and it has history. We had the Big Red Machine, we had icons, we had some of the greatest players in the history of the game. Cincinnati needs to be a centerpiece place in Major League Baseball.”
Votto was also dead, solid, perfect when asked when the Reds would sign Elly De La Cruz to a long-term contract: “We can’t afford him. He is going to cost roughly the GDP of a small country.”
Right on, Joey. You don’t even have to fill out an application to be GM. Just burst through CEO Bob Castellini’s door and say, “Here I am. When do I start?”
—PCA ALL THE WAY: Pete Crow-Armstrong is not a superstar. He is a superduperstar. For him MVP does’t mean Most Valuable player, it means Most Valarous Player.
Who hits five home runs in two games, as PCA did over the weekend against the Cincinnati Reds.
For some reason, Cubs manager Craig Counsell bats him leadoff and he has nine home runs this year leading off a game. Who does that?
And who does this? Before Saturday’s game, PCA chatted with former Cubs home run hitter Sammy Sosa. Sosa told him, “You’re going to hit three home runs tdoay.”
So PCA hit three home runs. Who does that?
—MILLER TIME: I never like to write that somebody should lose their job. . .A thought folks probably believe should happened to me years ago.
But, an exception one time. MLB umpire Bill Miller, 59, should retire. He’ll receive a more than comfortable pension.
In a recent Reds-Cubs game, his balls and strikes calls were challenged eight times. And all eight were reversed. That had never happened with baseball’s ABS challenge system.
So, Bill, take retirement. . .but be careful crossing streets.
—THROTTING BACK: Former Reds pitcher Tyler Mahle, now working for the Atlanta Braves, faced the Colorado Rockies Sunday and was grunting on every pitch, as several MLB pitchers do these days.
It sounds as if they are lifting hay bales instead of throwing fastball.
Sandy Koufax did that for the first six years of his career and had a losing record (36-40 with a fastball that was all over God’s great creation).
Then he said he learned to back off a bit, not try to throw so hard.
“By taking the grunt out of it, the fastball will behave better, with just as much life and better control, if you throttle back a little bit,” he said. “It saved my career.”
—THREE’S COMPANY: This one was forwarded to me by my loyal unpaid contributor Jeff Singleton:
“The Cincinnati Reds are the only team in MLB history to have a hitter under 25 with 30 homers and 100 RBI (Sal Stewart), a hitter under 25 with 20 homers and 20 stolen bases (Elly De La Cruz) and a pitcher under 25 with 15 wins (Chase Burns).
So why in the name of Marv Throneberry is this team in last place? Just check The Book of Statistics for the rest of the team.
This is not a Utopian team. It is barely a Utilitarian Team.
IT WAS IN THERE: Speaking of Tyler Mahle, remember when he was a seventh-round draft pick in 2013 by the Cincinnati Reds? His first four years with the Reds he was 13-25.
His flashes were like the wink of a lightning bug. . .a quick burst and gone.
Then in 2021 he was 13-6 with a 3.75 earned run average and turned free agent. He has pitched with little fanfare for the Texas Rangers and San Francisco Giants.
The Giants traded him to the Atlanta Braves this year at the trade deadline and. . .shazam. . .Mahle is 2-1 with a 1.48 earned run average for five starts. In 30 1/3 innings he has struck out 32 and walked five.
Sometimes you have to yank on the chain two or three times before the light comes on.
—HIT THE CLUTCH: There is no doubt that Tony Perez was ‘Mr. Clutch.’ Former Reds manager Dave Bristol alway said, “If the game goes long enough, Tony Perez will find a way to win it for you.”
So true, so true. But ‘Doggie’ was not even the Reds all-time clutch hitter. That status belongs to Frank Robinson.
In fact, Robinson is baseball’s all-time leader with walk-off RBI with 27. And former Reds manager Dusty Baker is second with 25. Perez is fifth on the all-time list with 21.
—QUOTE MACHINE: Baseball people (and football people) say the darndest things:
—FROM Reggie Jackson on skinflint Oakland A’s owner Charles O. Finley: “Finley is so cold he should make anti-freeze commercials.”
—FROM former Reds closer/broadcaster Jeff Brantley: “I’d rather a manager wear me out than freeze me out.”
—FROM former Reds first baseman Joey Votto, on the day pitcher Jon Lester was inducted into the Cubs Hall of Fame: “When I faced him, I considered 1 for 3, a single and walk, as a great day.”
—FROM former Alabama football coach Nick Saban, talking about Ohio State quarterback Julian Sayin: “Sayin was at Alabama and the coach played him on the scout team for the entire year. What a dumbass.”
—PLAYLIST NUMBER 205: As jazz musician Miles Davis put it, “I don’t play to be seen. I’m addicted to music, not audiences.”
—My Eyes Adore You (Frankie Valli), One Of These Nights (Eagles), Hey, Wont’t You Play (B.J. Thomas), He Don’t Love You, Like I Love You (Tony Orlando & Dawn), Drift Away (Dobie Gray), Will It Go ‘Round In Circles? (Billy Preston), We’re An American Band (Grand Funk Railroad).
—Love Me Like A Rock (Paul Simon), Shambala (Three Dog Night), I’m Doing Fine Now (New York City), My Sweet Lord (George Harrison), How Can You Mend A Broken Heart? (Al Green), Everything Is Beautiful (Ray Stevens), Alone Again, Naturally (Gilbert O’Sullivan).