Observations: From One-Run Games To Yankee Carnage

By Hal McCoy

UNSOLICITED OBSERVATIONS from The Man Cave wondering why only 14,089 fans showed up for Sunday’s Cincinnati Reds-San Francisco Giants game? Was FC Cincinnati playing at home, too?

—ONE AND DONE: As former pitcher Joaquin Andujar once said, “In baseball, I’ll say it in one word. . .youneverknow.”

Indeed.

On Saturday, there were 15 games and nine were decided by one run, including the Cincinnati Reds 3-2 decision over the San Francisco Giants.

It is a minuscule sample size, but does that bode positive for the Reds? They were 15-28 in one-run games last season.

But apparently the New York Yankees didn’t read Saturday’s script. They whomped the Milwaukee Brewers, 20-9.

In the Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary, there is a picture of Milwaukee pitcher Nestor Cortes next to ‘shell shock.’

After his first three pitches of the game he needed a new baseball. The first three sailed over the fences.

First pitch to Paul Goldschmidt, home run. First pitch to Cody Bellinger, home run. First pitch to Aaron Judge, home run. And later in that first inning, Austin Wells homered.

Goldschmidt and Bellinger are new Yankees and can you believe that Goldschmidt is batting leadoff.

Before the carnage ended, the Yankees had nine home runs, three by Judge. They were one short of the MLB record for one game, 10 by the Toronto Blue Jays against the Baltimore Orioles in 1987.

The Cincinnati Reds hit nine against the Philadelphia Phillies in a 1999 game and one was hit by current Yankees manager Aaron Boone.

Judge’s three homers included a grand slam and he drove in a career-best eight runs.

The Yankees followed that up on Sunday by crushing the Brewers again, 12-3, with three more home runs, including another by Judge.

That gave him four in the first three games, a Yankees record because it was never done by Babe Ruth, Lou Gehrig, Joe DiMaggio or Mickey Mantle.

And there was a cloud of mystery surrounding that explosion. Several Yankees were using bats designed by an MIT physicist that has more wood near the trademark and less up the barrel. They call them torpedo bats.

Are they legal? MLB says they are, so expect torpedo bats to show up in the bat racks of a franchise near you.

—A TITO TALE: So what if Terry Francona gets off to a slow start as manager of the Cincinnati Reds. It wouldn’t be the first time.

When he took over the Cleveland Indians in 2013, his record after 20 games was 8-12. After 30 games it was 16-14. Ater 60 games it was 30-30. After 90 games it was 46-44.

Then he went 46-26 over the final 72 games to finish 92-70.

Would the Reds take that? You bet your sweet Elly they would.

—A MOON SHOT: Hall of Fame Chicago Cubs third baseman Ron Santo hit a home run in Philadelphia in 1969 and as he rounded the bases, the crowd stood and cheered.

When he reached the dugout, he said to teammate Glenn Beckert, “I’ve never had a standing ovation on a road trip.”

Beckert laughed and said, “You still haven’t. Take a look at the scoreboard. A man has just walked on the moon.”

Knowing Philadelphia fans, it’s a wonder they didn’t boo Neil Armstrong.

—HIT OR MISS?: How good would Eugenio Suarez look at third base for the Cincinnati Reds?

He now plays for the Arizona Diamondbacks and hit four home runs in his first three games this season. Since last July, his 28 home runs are second most in MBL to the 30 hit by, who else, Shohei Ohtani and Aaron Judge.

Suarez was traded by the Reds to Seattle along with Jesse Winker just before the 2022 season for Justin Dunn, Jake Fraley, Brandon Williamson and Connor Phillips.

That was a pretty good haul for the Reds, but the benefits, if any, remain to be seen.

—IN APPRECIATION: Detroit Tigers pitcher Tarik
Skubal won the American League Cy Young last season, a unanimous choice, and knows who helped him the most.

Because catcher Jake Rogers caught all 192 innings that Skubal pitched, he gave Rogers a Rolex watch engraved with all his statistics.

Did he at least give the bullpen catcher a Timex?

—ANOTHER UECKER-ISM: From catcher/broadcaster/comedian Bob Uecker on one of his post-career projects:

“I’m running a school for kids. It is called ‘The Passed Ball School.’ It teaches kids to miss balls without letting people know you did it on purpose.”

And. . .”Every time I came up in a clutch or tough situation, I felt like I had to go to the bathroom.”

—1, 1, 1 and 1: For the first time since 2008 and only the second time ever, the four regional No. 1 seeds made the NCAA Final Four — Duke (They’re going to win it all), Houston, Florida and Auburn.

The only other time (2008) it was North Carolina, Memphis, Kansas and UCLA. Kansas won it all with an overtime win over Memphis.

So what does it mean this year? It’s all about NIL (Name, Image, Likeness) and the transfer portal. The rich get richer and the blue bloods get bluer.

—POINT OF VIEW: An atheist friend asked me how anybody could believe in God when nobody has ever seen him.

And I said, “Well, I believe in Home Depot employees.”

—THE AGING PROCESS: I’m 84 years old and in the immortal words of Mickey Mantle, “If I had known I would live this long I would have taken better care of myself.”

Fortunately, my beautiful wife, Nadine, has taken on that responsibiity for me. If there was a Hall of Fame for wives, she would be a unanimous first ballot inductee.

—PLAYLIST NUMBER 158: From well-known guitarist Robert Fripp: “Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence.”

—Skip A Rope (Henson Cargill), How Deep Is Your Love (BeeGees), Shining Star (Manhattans), I Got A Name (Jim Croce), Drift Away (Dobie Gray), I Love Rock And Roll (Joan Jett & The Blackhearts), Pass Me By (Johnny Rodriguez).

—You Forget About Me (Simple Minds), Who Can It Be Now (Men At Work), There Goes My Everything (Elvis Presley/Jack Greene), Abilene (George Hamilton IV), Wolverton Mountain (Claude King), If I Can’t Have You (Yvonne Elliman),