Observations: You Can Always Book It

By Hal McCoy

UNSOLICITED OBSERVATIONS from The Man Cave, just a few days (Tuesday) before the Cincinnati Reds appear live and in color in Dayton to play the team’s top prospects.

—BOOK IT, BILLY: It is sheer delight when I shamble across the street to the mailbox and find a package in a plain brown envelope.

Another baseball book.

This week it was a book written by my long-time great friend and fellow Hall of Fame baseball writer Bill Madden: “Yankees, Typewriters, Scandals And Cooperstown.”

A great read.

Madden once rode from New Jersey to Cooperstown in a car with Joe DiMaggio and was mesmerized by his stories.

In 1937, DiMaggio and Detroit’s Hank Greenberg were battling for the American League RBI total and late in the season Greenberg led by six.

At the time Yankee Stadium’s left-center wall was 457 feet from home plaate. DiMaggio said he twice came up with the bases loaded and blasted balls to the warning track, “Home runs in any other park in baseball, but just a couple of outs in Yankee Stadium. But the center fielder chased them both down.”

DiMaggio then revealed that the center fielder was his brother, Dom, and said, “He came to my apartment for dinner after the game and I didn’t talke to him the whole time.”

At a small town in the New York country-side, DiMaggio spotted a DQ and insisted on stopping for ice cream. Amazingly, the young lady serving the ice cream recognized DiMaggio, probably as Mr. Coffee and not as Joltin’ Joe or the Yankee Clipper. For whatever reason, she said, “There wont be any charge.”

When he returned to the care he said, “How do they stay in business when they don’t charge?”

Uh, Joe. It was just for you.

—BIG D (NOT DALLAS): When Don Drysdale pitched for the Los Angeles Dodgers, the man called ‘Big D’ threw fastballs about two inches under the batter’s chin. Hitters crowded home plate at their own peril.

And it worked. He was particularly effective against Cincinnati Reds Hall of Famers Johnny Bench (0 for 18, no homers) and Tony Perez (6 for 31, no homers).

Hall of Famer-to-be Dick Allen was 3 for 46 with no homers. Henry Aaron did hit .267 with 17 home runs against Drysdale, but said, “When Drysdale is on his game, I’m outclassed.”

And if you wish to cringe, check out the first song in this edition’s Playlist. Yes, it’s a recording done by Drysdale

—QUOTE: From former Dodgers pitcher Don Drysdale to umpire Frank Secory: “A potato has better eyes that you.” (Did he follow that up by calling Secory ‘Mr. Potato Head?’

—18 AND OUT: So they opened the 2025 MLB season in Tokyo, the Los Angeles Dodgers against the Chicago Cubs.

Was it a coincidence that both starting pitchers were Japanese, Yosh Yamamoto for the Dodgers and Shota Imanaga for the Cubs? And, of course, the Dodgers had Shohei Ohtani and the Cubs had Seiya Suzuki.

And did you notice that both Japanese pitchers wore uniform No. 18, definitely not a coincidence? Back in the 1960s, the Tokyo Giants traditionally issued uniform No. 18 to their best starter, their ace.

It caught on and when Japanese pitchers come to America they always request number 18, including Hiroki Kuroda, Kenta Maeda, Yusei Kikuchi, Daiskuke Matsuzaka, Masahiro Tanaka, Tomo Ohka.

—A TOUGH ADMISSION: It is very often that I’m asked, “Who do you think was the best all-time player?” And, no, I never saw Ty Cobb nor Babe Ruth play.

To me, the best player was a guy I despise to this day and I once told him to his face and he laughed in my face.

This is the only player in MLB history with more than 3,000 hits, more than 300 homers, more than a .300 career batting average and more than 300 stolen bases.

And despite all those glossy and glittery offensive numbers, he may have been better on defense. . .which is why I despise him.

His name is Willie Mays and I’ve turned my nose up on him ever since he made that catch on Vic Wertz in the 1954 World Series. Wertz was my favoirte player on my favorite team, the Cleveland Indians.

—QUOTE: From industrialist Tucker Elliot: “Vic Wertz once hit a ball rather famously that was later described as such: ‘It would have been a home run in any other park, including Yellowstone.’ Instead, he’s remembered as the guy who got robbed by Willies May,” (It wasn’t robbery, it was grand larceny in front of 52,751 live witnesses.)

—OH, OUCH: One of my favorite all-time lines that made it into a newspaper was written by Akron Beacon Journal baseball writer Jim Schlemmer.

When Cleveland Indians pitcher Bob Feller got hit in the groin by a line drive, Schlemmer wrote, “Feller got hit where only a feller can get hit.”

—ANOTHER UECKER-ISM: From catcher/broadcster/comedian Bob Uecker: “I visited a kid in a hospital with a reporter and a photographer. Like Babe Ruth, I promised the kid I’d hit a home run for him in that night’s game. I struck out four times and had two passed balls. The kid had a relapse.”

—VOICE OF REASON: University of Nevada coach Steve Alford, saying what nearly every basketball coach really believes about today’s college basketball landscape:

“I never thought, as a basketball coach, I’d ask a player, ‘How much do you want to be paid?’ I never thought that would happen in college basketball.

“I’ve always been a big proponent of, as the game and money has changed, I never been one to say, ‘Student-athletes shouldn’t be paid.’ But the way it is now is ridiculous. It’s utterly ridiculous. It has changed our game.”

Indeed, it certainly has changed the game, Steve, and not for the betterment of the game.

—NO BEAT THE CLOCK: When is the Ohio High School Athletic Association (OHSAA) going to quit playing Rip Van Winkle and wake up to join the modern basketball world.

Ohio’s high schools do not have a shot clock. Teams can hold the ball for as long as it can hold on to the ball until game’s end.

Garfield Heights discovered it couldn’t hold it in a regional final in Canton. To start the fourth quarter, the No. 1 rated D-III school led No. 4 Louisville and decided to hold the ball, even though it possesses one of the state’s best players, 4-star Ohio State commit Marcus Johnson.

Garfield Heights led, 48-37, when its coach ordered the team to take no shots, hold the ball for the final six minutes.

Suddenly, the ball became a slithery piece of leather and turnover after turnover piled up. Louisville went on a 12-0 run and won, 49-48.

Garfield Heights got what it deserved.

—THE ‘AWFUL’ HOUSE: Comedian Jim Gaffigan’s description of The Waffle House: “Imagine a gas station bathroom that sells waffles. Here’s something you’ll never hear in a Waffle House: ‘Nice job cleaning up.’’’

—PLAYLIST NUMBER 155: From world conqueror Napolean Bonaparte: “Music is what tells us that the human race is greater than we realize.” (For certain, Napolean would not have liked Stonewall Jackson’s rendition of ‘Waterloo’).

—One Love (Don Drysdale), Make The World Go Away (Eddy Arnold), Lord, I Hope This Day Is Good (Don Williams), Release Me (Wilson Phillips), I’ll Never Find Another You (Seekers), Frozen Margarrita (John Stone), Over And Over (Dave Clark Five).

—Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood (Animals),
For Your Love (Yardbirds), Help! (Beatles), I Know A Place (Petula Clark), In The Midnight Hour (Wilson Pickett), Keep On Dancin’ (Gentrys), Liar, Liar (Castaways), Never Gonna Give You Up (Rick Astley), Hold On To The Night (Richard Marx), Landslide (Fleetwood Mac).