By Hal McCoy
UNSOLICITED OBSERVATIONS from The Man Cave while watching Kyle Schwarber swing a bat, making me want to drop my Nadine-made margarita and grab a bat. Well, almost.
—CLOSE PROXIMITY: It is approximately 25 miles from 1618 Pinecrest Drive in Dayton to 6339 Todhunter Road in Middletown.
The Pinecrest address is where Michael Jack Schmidt grew up and the Todhunter address is where Kyle Joseph Schwarber grew up.
On Wednesday night, Schwarber hit four home runs and drove in nine runs as the Philadelphia Phillies crushed the Atlanta Braves, 19-4. Those four homers would about cover the acreage between Todhunter and Pinecrest.
It was the Phillies first individual four-homer game in 50 years, since Mike Schmidt did it in 1976 against the Chicago Cubs. It helped the Phillies overcome a 12-1 deficit to win and his fourth homer was a game-winner, 18-16.
No MLB player has hit five in a game but Schwarber had another at bat after his fourth homer. He popped up.
“I wish I hadn’t tried to hit a homer on that last at bat, but I did,” he said.
Schwarber is the 21st player to hit four homers in a game and only the fourth with an opporunity to hit five. The others: Bobby Lowe of the Boston Beaneaters against the Red(1894), Lou Gehrig (1932) and former Reds outfielder Mike Cameron for Seattle (2002).
Other noteworthy four-homer players: Former Reds third baseman Eugenio Suarez for Arizona (2025), Cincinnati’s Scooter Gennett (2017), Former Reds outfielder Josh Hamilton for Texas (2012), Mark Whiten for St. Louis against the Reds (1993), Willie Mays (1961), Rocky Colavito for Cleveland (1959).
Schwarber was the third player this season to hit four in a game. Can they send some of those baseball’s ℅ Great American Ball Park?
One last note on the four-homer guys and it points to the struggles and troubles encountered this season by the Atlantaa Braves. Schwarber and Suarez both hit four homers against the Braves, the only team in MLB history to give up four homers to one player twice in a season.
Chop that one up, Braves fans.
—BACK TO THE FUTURE: The Arizona Diamondbaks, out of necessity, played old-school baseball in a game this week against the Milwaukee Brewers.
And I savored every minute.
With their bullpen completely depleted, the Diamondbacks sent 29-year-old rookie Taylor Rashi to the mound for his major-league debut against the Bombastic Brewers.
It was the seventh inning and the D’Backs led, 6-4. And Rashi recorded a save. . .no ordinary save. He pitched the seventh, eighth and ninth for an old-school three-inning save.
To make it more remarkable, he faced Christian Yelich in the ninth inning with two on and two outs. He went to 3-and-2 with the Milwaukee fans going bonkers and coaxed a game-ending ground ball.
He is the 16th different Arizona pitcher to record a save this season, an MLB record. Despite being as green as the back of a $20 bill, Rashi displayed more brass than the trumpet section of an orchestra.
Amazingly, Rashi was drafted in the 23rd round of the 2019 draft by the San Francisco Giants, the 686th player picked.
Before his MLB debut, he pitched in 167 minor league games and made stops in Salem (Ore.), Eugene, Richmond, Amarillo and Reno.
Baseball, ya gotta love it.
—THE LONG WALK: The New York Yankees led the Washington Nationals, 1-0, when they came to bat for the bottom of the third Wednesday afternoon.
I left the Man Cave and walked two blocks to the Starbucks in Kroger for a vente non-fat latte. Then I walked another block to Walgreen’s for the usual long wait to fill a prescription.
I walked the three blocks home, 40 minutes after I left, and the Yankees were just concluding the bottom of the third.
They hit four homers and scored nine runs. The half-inning took 41 minutes and Washington pitchers threw 77 pitches, four of which landed in Souvenir City.
And what’s that old line: Washington, first in war, first in peace and last in the Natinal League East.
—HERE’S THE PITCH: When New York Mets rookie pitcher Nolan McLean beat the Philadelphia Phillies this week, he did something no other Mets pitcher has done.
Not Tom Seaver. Not Dwight Gooden. Not Nolan Ryan. Not Ron Darling. Not Jon Matlack. Not Matt Harvey. Not Jacob deGrom.
McLean has won his first three career starts and no other Mets pitcher ever did it.
—NICK THAT NAME: What the Cincinnati Reds need is a star player with a great nickname, like Cal Raleigh’s ‘The Big Dumper.’ And don’t suggest ‘The Big Slumper,’ although it fits most of the Reds lineup.
There’s Nick Kurtz, ‘The Big Amish’ of the A’s, the first rookie to hit four homers in a game on a day he tied an MLB record with 19 total bases. And there is Aaron Judge, ‘Al Rise.’ Bryce Harper is ‘Bam Bam.’ Mets’ pitcher Sean Manaea is ‘The Throwin’ Samoan.’
Phillies pitcher Jhoan Duran is ‘The Durantula,’ (Get it? Tarantula). Aroldis Chapman is ‘The Cuban Missile.’
—POWER PLAY: The New York Yankees were one of the last MLB teams to integrate, preferring to be lily white until they added a black catcher, Elston Howard, to their roster in 1955.
But four years before then, the Yankees had a black player in their minor-league system named Vic Power. In 1952 he hit .331 at Triple-A Kansas City. Did he get promoted? Nope. Back to Kansas City for 1953 and he led the American Association at .349. Did that earn him a promotion to the big leagues?
Nope. The Yankees thought he was too flashy at first base, not the Yankee way. They thought he was too ostentatious, driving a Cadillac convertible around town with the top down. And most egregious, he often had a white women sitting in the front seat with him.
So they traded him to the Philadelphia Athletics and about the trade Power said, “The Yankees were waiting to see if I could turn white before they brought me up, but I could never do that.”
—GOING, GOING, NOT GONE: Every MLB hitter, even the best, seems to have a pitching kryptonite. For Henry Aaron it was soft-tossing Curt Simmons and Aaron hated to step into the batter’s box against him.
Aaron hir 755 home runs. . .almost 756. One game against Simmons, Aaron jumped at a pitch and hit it out of the ball park. But he was called for being out of the batter’s box and the home run was negated and he was ruled out.
Speaking of Aaron, he wore uniform number 44 and four times during his career he hit exactly 44 home runs in a season. Too bad he didn’t wear 62.
—TRIVA TIME: Stuff nobody cares about but me and my readers (I think):
—It is well-known that Cy Young’s 511 wins are the most ever by any pitcher. But do you know who lost the most games? Yep, Cy Young, 316. So why did they name an award after such a loser?
—This is a stunner. Bob Gibson had more career complete games than he had career wins. He completed 255 games, but only won 251.
—QUOTE MACHINE: Baseball people say the darndest and funniest things:
—From Bob Uecker, catcher/broadcaster/comedian: “I was so proud when a fan told me he always looked for my bubble gum card so he could use it as a BB-gun target.”
—From should-be Hall of Famer Pete Rose after facing Tommy John after Tommy John had Tommy John surgery: “I knew Tommy had to have a new arm, but did they have to give him Sandy Koufax’s?”
—From Pete Rose (Part II) on facing Hall of Fame pitcher Don Sutton: “I wore his ass out. There were two guys on the Dodgers I wore out, Don Sutton and Bob Welch. I could have gone up to the plate blindfolded and hit Don Sutton. Ray Charles could hit Don Sutton and he couldn’t see very well.”
(Rose hit .308 with eight RBI in 88 plate appearances against Sutton, so Sutton didn’t really need posterior surgery.)
—From former player turned broadcaster John Kruk: “Whoever invented the first clock. . .how did he know what time it was?”
—TELL US, TOM: Former TV sports legend Dick Schaap once put together a dinner attended by several sports journalists, Muhammad Ali and Tom Seaver.
It became apparent midway through the dinner that Ali was not a baseball fan when he leaned over and whispered in Seaver’s ear, “What newspaper do you write for?”
Seaver should have said, “The Cooperstown Chronicle and didn’t I read an article you wrote in the Police Gazette?”
—THE WRIGHT WAY: Another gem from my favorite comedian, the genius Steven Wright: “Who first put the alphabet in order?” Funny, but who did?
—BUY THIS, BUT THAT: The frustration of watching Ohio State and the Texas on TV is the all-out assault of commercials. During every break in the action, and they are legion, there are seven to eight commercials.
In between advertising plugs for toothpaste, diet drinks, firm mattresses and support hose, Ohio State knocked off Texas, 14-7.
And some guy posting on Facebook as ‘SEC Numbers Guy,’ created a post he is eating for breakfast this morning, without bananas because he already slipped on the peels.
Said he, “Experts are beginning to worry of a blowout in the Texas vs. Ohio State game as it is becoming evident that Texas holds the talent edge in virtually every position group. Many are worried if this will be g]the most lopsided Top 3 matchup ever.”
Oh, yeah. Hook ‘em Shorthorns.
—PLAYLIST NUMBER 107: As novelist/poet George Eliot put it: “Life seems to go on without effort when I am filled with music.”
—Buckeye Battle Cry (Ohio State Marching Band), Fight The Team Across The Field (OSU Marching Band), Hang On Sloopy (OSU Marching Band), Don’t Stop Believin’ (Richard Goodall), Angel Baby (Rosie & The Originals), For The Good Times (Ray Price), One Summer Night (The Danleers).
You Belong To Me (The Duprees), Oh, Sherrie (Steve Perry), It’s So Easy (Buddy Holly), Poor Little Fool (Ricky Nelson), Let Your Love Flow (Bellamy Brothers), Rich Girl (Hall & Oates), Summertine Blues (Eddie Cochran), Who’s Crying Now? (Journey).