By Hal McCoy
UNSOLICITED OBSERVATIONS from The Man Cave, wasting away in Mancaveville with the west coast late-night Cincinnati Reds exasperations.
—The ‘Manfraud’: As a frequent guest on his great Lexington, Ky. sports talk show, awesome host Alan Cutler, ‘The Cut Man,’ he loves it when I refer to the baseball commissioner as Rob Manfraud.
On a recent show he asked me to repeat ‘Manfraud’ a half dozen times.
So one can imagine how much I loved a recent column by great friend and super journalist Kevin Kernan in his ‘ballnine’ column.
And I quote: . . .” wondering why Rob Manfred (Manfraud) hates baseball so much. Manfred (Manfraud) will retire in January of 2029 and officially head to the golf course. If he golfs like he commissions: ‘Fore.’
“Manfred (Manfraud) released his latest diabolical plan to ESPN during the Little League Classic and it is another step in destroying the traditions of the game that once were so sacred.
“Hello Nashville. Hello Salt Lake City. Hello eight divisions with four teams in each division. Goodbye American League, which has only been around since 1901. Goodbye National League, which has been around even longer, since 1876,
“The Glory of Their Times has been replaced by Manfred’s (Manfraud’s) continuing assault on the game, The Gory of Their Times.”
Well put, Kevin, extremely well put.
—SERIES-IOUSLY SPEAKING: And here is one to chew on and spit out the way Cincinnati Reds manager Tito Francona does with sunflower seeds.
The Reds have lost more series than they’ve won this season so far. That’s right. They are 17-21-3 despite their overall winning record of 67-63.
According to the Elias Sports Bureau, no team has every finished a season with a winning record and never been swept while losing more series than it won.
And how about scoring two or fewer runs in 42 games and going 5-37 in those games?
Only the Reds.
Speaking of series, and completely unrelated but outstanding, Philadelphia’s Kyle Schwarber has hit at least one home run in each of the team’s last 15 series.
—FIVE IS ENOUGH: It is never acceptable to throw a baseball bat at a pitcher, even after he hits you with a 90 miles an hour fastball. . .not once, not twice. Three times.
Seattle Mariners outfielder Victor Robles was on rehab with the Triple-A Tacoma Rainiers.
In 18 plate appearances, Las Vegas Aviators pitchers plunked him five times. Joe Estes hit him in successive at bats after he hit him once previously in a big league game.
Fed up, Robles hurled his bat at Estes. He didn’t hit him. Then he went into the dugout and threw all the sunflower packages on the field, which would have infuriated Cincinnati Reds manager Tito Francona, the King of Sunflower Seed Chewers.
Robles was suspended for 10 games when he returns to the Mariners.
In this case, I’m on his side.
—WAGS TO RICHES: Never understood why it took so long to get Billy Wagner into the Hall of Fame — 422 saves, 1,196 strikeouts.
He is the first left-handed closer to make it and the first to make it from a Division III school. He attended Ferrum College in Virginia.
Wagner, who started out as a right-hander and transformed himself into a left-hander, grew up poor in rural Virginia. He was bullied in school because he wore shoes bought at a flea market and brought nothing to school for lunch but crackers.
How can one not root for a guy like that? And, by the way, the current Ferrum baseball coach is Eric Owens, the Reds’ No. 4 draft pick out of Ferrum in 1992.
—A SIX-PACK: While doing some research, I ran across perhaps the greatest offensive game ever put together by one hitter in one game.
It happened in 1999 during a Florida State-Maryland game. A kid named Marshall McDougall opened with a single for Florida State. Big Deal?
Well, he then proceeded to hit home runs in his next six at bats. Six homers in a row. For the game he was 7-for-7 with 16 RBI and 25 total bases. And his last home run in the ninth inning was a grand slam.
I checked. The game was not played in Williamsport on the Little League field.
I’d say the Maryland coach was one stubborn guy to continue to pitch to him.
The White Sox drafted him in the 41st round and he had 18 MLB at bats in 2005 with the Texas Rangers. He had three hits, hit no homers and struck out 10 times.
—NOT A NO-NO: The Reds recent stop at Disneyland, well, down the street at Angels Stadium, brought to mind a no-hitter that wasn’t a no-hitter.
The Angels’ Jared Weaver started a game against the Los Angeles Dodgers in Dodger Stadium. Weaver gave up a run in the fifth inning when he made an error that put Matt Kemp on first. He stole second, moved to third on a ground ball and scored on a sacrifice fly.
One run, no hits.
Weaver and the bullpen didn’t give up a hit, but the offense didn’t score and the 1-0 score stood up.
Since the game was in Dodger Stadium and the Angels didn’t score in the top of the ninth, the Dodgers didn’t bat in the ninth. So it was an eight-inning no-hitter and eight-inning no-hitters don’t count.
The Angels gave up no hits and lost 1-0. Ah, baseball. Ya gotta love it.
—TRIVIA TIME (BORROWED): Some gems from my unpaid but loyal correspondent Jeff Singleton.
—Kevin Youkalis, a Cincinnati native who played mostly for the Boston Red Sox, played 10 years in the majors and made 4,436 plate appearances. And not once, never, did he swing at a 3-and-0 pitch.
—Ted Williams had a career batting average of .344 and won six batting titles. And yet he never had a 200-hit season. The year he hit .406 (1941) he had 185 hits. His tops was 194 in 1949. Why? Because pitchers walked him, walked him and walked him, 147 times in 1941, his .406 season.
—Believe this one if you’re gullible, and I am. Somebody put it out there that when pitchers could hit, Bartolo Colon swung and missed 610 times and his batting helmet flew off 583 times.
Can anybody dispute that with proof?
—QUIZ TIME: Who are the top eight collectors of his for their careers while playing for the Cincinnati Reds? This list is in alphabetical order and see if you can put them in order of most hits in a Reds uniform: Johnny Bench, Dave Concepcion, Barry Larkin, Bid McPhee, Tony Perez, Vada Pinson, Pete Rose, Joey Votto.
The correct order is at the bottom of the blog.
—KICK IT AROUND: With the NFL season upon us, how about figuring out how many teams have nicknames that end in ‘ers.’ A bunch.
Packers, Raiders, 49ers, Chargers, Commanders, Panthers, Steelers, Buccaneers. For the math challenged (like me), that’s eight.
—SOME LEE-WAY: Lee Corso, 90, makes his final appearance on College Football GameDay Saturday when Ohio State hosts Texas, his retirement/going away party.
It was in 1996 when he donned his first mascot head to make his game prediction and it was the head of Ohio State’s Brutus Buckeye.
Since then, he has done it 430 times. His record? 286-144. He has slipped his noggin into the Brutus Buckeye head 43 times, the most of any team.
And even though Texas is ranked No. 1 and Ohio State is ranked No. 3, I’ll go out on a thin branch here and say, “Not so fast, friend.” He is going to put on Brutus one last time. . .first time and last time.
—QUOTE MACHINE: Baseball people say the darndest and funniest things:
—From Clint Hurdle, one of my all-time favorite managers and inspirational speakers: “We can measure everything with radar guns and analytics, but none of these can measure guts and nuts.”
—From Gil Hodges when he managed the New York Mets, talking about the defense of Willie Mays: “I can’t very well tell my hitters don’t hit it to him. Wherever they hit it, he’s there anyway.”
—From Willie Mays: “I think I was the best baseball player I ever saw.” (It must be tough hitting a slider while looking in a mirror.)
—From Pete Rose: “I wrote a book before I ever read one.” (And he didn’t really write that first book, baseball writer Bob Hertzel wrote it for him.)
—From Bob Uecker, catcher/broadcaster/comedian: “My career highlight was getting out of a rundown against the New York Mets.”
—PLAYLIST NUMBER 105: As singer Marilyn Manson put it, “Music is the strongest form of magic.”
—I’m Your Puppet (James & Bobby Purify), Main Street (Bob Seger), Till I Kissed You (Everly Brothers), All My Rowdy Friend Have Settled Down (Hank Williams), Highway (Shaboozey), Dance With Me (Orleans), It’s Not Unusual (Tom Jones).
—I Was Made For Lovin’ You (Kiss), A Horse With No Name (America), Ain’t No Sunshine (Billy Williams), Why Can’t We Be Friends? (Smash Mouth), Band of Gold (Freda Payne), Cherish (The Association), Angie (Rolling Stones), Maniac (Michael Sembell), Hit The Road Jack (Ray Charles).
—QUIZ ANSWER: Rose, Larkin, Concepcion, McPhee, Votto, Bench, Perez, Pinson.